hat is it about food with holes that fascinates us so?" the essayist would ask, and then ­ struggling, however wearily, to rise above his subject ­ proceed to answer his own question with a lot of guff about the cyclical nature of Nature, the essential emptiness of all phenomena, the ego's readiness to project itself onto every available blankness, and the subtle aesthetic tension of presence confronting absence. "Does the hole add to or detract from the food of which it is a part?"

Uh, good question. But here at Epicurious, we trust that you already know what hole foods mean to you; certainly, you don't need "experts" to belabor the issue. We're confident, too, that you know which size hole foods you prefer. And so we're providing you with the template below, in the hope that it will deepen your understanding of the bigger picture and maybe even inspire you to experiment a little. If you do print out this tool, however, please remember to use it only for peaceful purposes. In the immortal words of Dylan Thomas, "Doughnut, go gentle into that good night."

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